| First of all, to be able to meet in person you have to
be in contact with people. So don’t be afraid to contact someone
you’re interested in. You can send them a chat invitation if they
are online at the same time as you are or you can send them a message.
Another nice way to break the ice is by sending a wink. You can send a
member a wink and even follow it up with a short message.
You also need to be seen. To be taken seriously, make others feel comfortable
with you and to show you are available, uploading a photo of yourself
really helps. Members without photos are hardly noticed and get much less
attention than members with photos.
The phone is optional. Do not give out your home phone number. Block
your number or call from a cell phone. We also have audio in our messenger
chat box. All you need is a microphone that hooks up to your computer.
This way, you can talk to the person for free and without exchanging numbers.
Just look for a/v in the chat box. You may have to maximize the size of
the box to find it. If you have a cam you can chat live on cam as well
as talking to them via the microphone.
Keep the initial contact fairly short. You want to leave the person intrigued
and waiting to here more, instead of hearing your entire life story the
first day or week. It’s always more intriguing to get to know a
little bit about a person at a time, isn’t it? Make sure you save
enough interesting information about yourself for your first date.
When do you meet in person? How long does one wait? Everyone goes at
their own pace when it comes to meeting in person, but asking someone
that you feel you possibly click with to meet after a few emails sounds
reasonable. Waiting too long can lead to the person meeting someone else
that they click with, becoming disinterested because the momentum has
changed, or at the other end of the scale, an attachment could start and
both parties now have very high expectations of who they are meeting.
It’s nice to keep it light and just enjoy meeting the person with
no expectations in person. If you’re pleasantly surprised, then
great!
How do you ask? Just come out and ask if they would like to meet you
at so and so place on so and so day. Make sure to stay confident and come
across relaxed during this whole process. A desperate sounding person
is a very big turn off for dating material.
Remember that it’s very easy to narrow the search field too much
on dating sites because there are so many people and all the tools are
at your fingertips. You don’t want to miss out on a potentially
great person just because they don’t have the most perfect photo
or bio. If you get a general good feel about the person and seem to click,
get out there! It’s only one date!
So bottom line is, if you’re serious about meeting someone special,
remember dating is a numbers game. You must meet a lot of people to get
to that right person. So the best thing you could do is start connecting
online and making dates to meet members that interest you.
BallsInYourCourt
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